I’m Sorry

I know I’ve been lazy. I said I’ll update this blog more frequently but I haven’t. It’s really hard to write crazy and funny at the same time but no excuses. I apologies to my fans, woops I mean fan. I’m making a new commitment to keep this blog up to date, in fact here is a new one:

I remember listening to this women talking about how the human body is a beautiful thing, but she didn’t think it was so beautiful when I flung my crap at her.

Volunteering

I love volunteering my time at the homeless shelter and laughing at all the bums.

Whale Sandwich

I really hate activists and their save the world attitude.  Hey if I want a fur coat I’m going clubbing for baby seals.  If I want a whale sandwich I’m going to eat a whale sandwich.  If I want a pencil I’m going to cut down a rain forest.