Archive for the ‘Friends’ Category

Cell Phone

August 27, 2008

A friend on mine was talking on his cell phone one day. I approached him and asked, “Hey, are you selling drugs?”

“Why would you ask me such a thing?”

“Because you’re black and you have a cell phone.”

My Spleen

August 27, 2008

My friend dared me that I couldn’t stab my spleen. It took me awhile but I finally found it. It was hiding behind my left eye.

Mean And Nasty

July 31, 2008

My friend asked me once, “Why are you so mean and nasty?”

“Because nice people die young. I should know, who do you think killed my brother.”

Choking

August 15, 2007

My friend was choking on some food once, so I punched in the back of the head as hard as possible.

An Old Friend Of Mine

June 20, 2007

I ran into an old friend of mine. When we started to talk about family he showed me a picture of his late wife and I said, “Wow, she’s ugly. You actually married that thing?” He got so angry that he started to hit me until I was able to get into my car and run him over. That’s why I ran into an old friend of mine.

Having Friends

March 28, 2007

I hate having friends, they’re too expensive to hire.