Knife

Never accept a knife as a gift from someone, you never know if they used it in a crime or not. How do you think I got my son sent to jail.

A New Invention

They should event a butt club, for men who don’t like being raped.  When you’re in jail and you have to take a bath, just strap on the butt club.  Yes, the butt club can protect you from all foreign objects trying to penetrate your rectum.  You to no longer have to worry about being left on the bathroom floor with blood coming out of your butt.  All you have to do is put it on, give it a simple twist and keep your butt hole, a virgin butt hole.  Warring:  may cause lice, irritation, rash, and please don’t put it on backwards.    

Feed The Fish

You know what really sucks about going to jail, getting raped.  Think about this, you’re in the shower one day minding your own business when you hear, “I think I see some new fresh meat.”  You turn around slowly and see this big ugly man standing behind you.

“That’s right boy, your sweet virgin anus is gonna to be mine.  You better hold on to something.”

The only thing you can do is clench your butt with one hand and cover your mouth with the other hand, just in case he wants to “feed the fish.”  But what if he says, “You still have a nose.”